On being small – Alt Ed Austin

Laura Delgado, who founded and directs The Nest at The Montessori Tree, joins us on the blog today to share a bit of her vast wisdom about children, parents, education, and “smallness.” She also invites you to a lovely annual event for children and their parents in South Austin this weekend.

One of my daughter’s favorite books ever was You Are (Not) Small by Anna Kang. In the book, two creatures struggle to agree about which of them is big and which is small. Eventually, they come to realize that size is relative, of course.

I loved this book because it inspired so many conversations with my daughter about her size and how she felt about being small in a world full of big people. Frankly, she continues to have mixed feelings about it. 

Just the other day, my husband commented on how big she was getting and she said, “Don’t say that. I want to be small still. I want to be teeny tiny.”

I imagine many children feel this way. While they certainly appear frustrated, at times, about not being able to do everything they want to do on account of their size, I also think many relish their “smallness.” It’s as if they know how fleeting childhood really is . . . says the mom who can’t fathom that her daughter will soon be entering the tween years!

On the other hand, we, as adults, often find ourselves amazed at how quickly our children are growing. And, many times, we feel compelled to comment, “Look how big you are!”

Years ago, I asked a young friend, “Are you ready to use the potty? You’re big now.” Of course, I falsely assumed that he wanted to be big and that my question would somehow motivate him to use the potty.

And, of course, it backfired. He was quick to respond, “But, I don’t want to be big.”

I felt that deeply! And, it taught me a valuable lesson about the assumptions and biases we bring into our classroom and how important it is to continually challenge those assumptions in our work with children.